~ Charles Stewart
http://facebook.com/1stCharlesStewart
Archive for July, 2010
Know that there is that within you, which will attempt to cloud your perceptions and to distort the insights that you receive from within. This is fear at work. For those who are willing to endure the discomforts in the process of “honest self-assessment” which result in “behavioral changes” that lead to self-actualization; know that there are indeed benefits for all concerned, except perhaps for the negative individuals you will encounter.
The willingness of an individual to question their perceptions of the surroundings that they find themselves in is a first step towards self-awareness. Questioning of these perceptions helps to bring insights to bear in the lessons of the life. The resulting comprehension or understanding becomes a very great asset, for it very much reduces the tendency of fear in the life.
During stressful periods in the life, particularly while going through “major internal developmental milestones,” the fear will be significantly less. Now, I do not mean to imply that the stress will be non-existent. Rather, I do mean to say that the difficulty and upheaval will be considerably less with self-awareness and comprehension. This perhaps will show itself most clearly, where the potential for intimacy in the life exists. And by intimacy, I am meaning very close personal relationships; whether with self, or others.
With self-awareness and the resultant comprehension, the tendency to “flee” or “reject” the experience of intimacy will be greatly reduced. Realize that occasionally this process of becoming more self-aware is very difficult; this is because of the shift in perspective for the life. To those “negative ones” you come across in life, what you are becoming is unwelcome and threatening.
If you do indeed shift your perspective in life, be aware that not everyone will greet you with open arms. Yet, through all of it, you must be what you can become. A loving acknowledgement of your own uniqueness will show you how to begin to use your own abilities and potentials in your own way, and to trust your present situation, whatever it may be.
You have not yet materialized your ideal self. It is more just the essence of a direction. Although, this direction can only be found by using what you have now, and to express as best you can, your own abilities and potentials through the opportunities of your present moments in your life.
When you look to others for the answers to your overall life situations, you are denying your own abilities of self-understanding and growth. Begin where you are right now, and joyfully start to expand or develop those inherent or in-born characteristics and abilities that are your own, without expecting them to appear full-blown overnight.
As you do this, you will be affirming or making known your own rightness in the universe, and because of this, you will easily and automatically cooperate with others as a part of your own nature. You, by being yourself, will help others be themselves.
You will not find yourself jealous anymore of other’s talents that you do not possess, and so you can openheartedly encourage them in others. Because you do recognize your own uniqueness or individuality, you will not need to dominate others, nor shrink before them. You must begin to trust yourself, with all that implies. For if you do not, you will forever be looking to others to prove your own merit or value to you, and so you will never be satisfied.
The greatest gift of all is yours by birthright. It is that of creating your own reality according to your beliefs about it. There are no true limitations to the self. Except of course, those believed in and accepted out of ignorance. To achieve greatness in your life, you must expand yourself intuitively and intellectually. (And yes, this includes those of you who consider yourself “entrepreneurial professionals;” in whatever “capacity.”)
There is no reason personal growth and development must be painful or difficult, change must be threatening, or progress must be marked with pain. Why are there so few who are willing to learn through joy? Learn to be kind to yourself and to others as you move forward in your own life, little by little, becoming one with your own knowing.
Do not be afraid to confront that which you may find within your own perceptions as you explore the concept of self-discovery, even if it is painful or difficult at times. Living your life with fear in your heart is not only counterproductive in making reasonable choices on personal issues, it very much tends to increase the presence of itself in your life even more.
If you can find a way to transcend your fear, you will find that life does indeed have something quite wonderful to teach you…
~ Charles Stewart
http://facebook.com/1stCharlesStewart
I want to challenge each and every one of you with all of this, so that you might begin to expand or enlarge the beliefs that you do carry within your own psychological make-ups, which represent the boundaries or limits of your own possible life experiences. For after all, how can anyone grow beyond the beliefs they hold, that surround them like fences, if they do not even know they are there?
Ultimately, this would cause them to improve the quality of their life and that of others, simply by being who they truly are. Who and what you really are –your identity- is actually much greater than what you can see of yourself in a mirror.
In this article, I will not be speaking so much to the part of you that you know of as yourself, as I will to the part of you that you do not know. Understand that this takes into account that which involves the development of any human being, irrespective of where on the planet they may live.
As any human being goes through their life, measuring that they experience by the “voice” of their own conscience, remember that this voice may speak to them with the “voices” of their own mothers, fathers, grandparents, adult caregivers, teachers, religious leaders, spiritual teachers, and so forth. The voice is their own or course, but the ideas behind it may not be.
All of these people early on in their life helped shape them into the person they became. This was out of a loving concern, with their ideas of what was best for them and the world around them. They accepted this at the time and it was good. Nonetheless, one day it will become your own responsibility to grow your own voice of conscience to guide you in the journey of your life.
This process is not so unlike that of a very young child who accepts the ideas given to them by their parents, because the child believes them to always be right, and somehow perfect. Yet later, as a much older child, they become almost shocked to learn of their parents not only being sometimes wrong, but also imperfect as well.
Furthermore, they gradually begin to perceive the older generations in general as being somehow outdated, inferior, callous, and doing everything “wrong” – more or less. Nevertheless, these very things are used to help free the older child from the earlier childish concepts used to grow up with. In addition, this all provides the challenges to tackle personal and world problems as the older child becomes an adult and moves out into the world on their own.
Remember that the new adult, who starts out on their own, brings with them this “voice of conscience” from their earlier experiences. In addition, for a while to come, the new adult feels invincible, almost somehow beyond the boundaries of physical life itself. Without a doubt, it is this very quality, which provides the necessary drive or impetus to endow them with the strength and energy to begin a new life and form a world experience.
Later on in the life, as they become a “seasoned life veteran,” there does indeed come a time when they may begin to reassess or reconsider what they have carried within their own psychological and emotional being throughout the life thus far; and this is the focus of this article. As they approach this “point of the life,” often they will come to sense an approaching “internal developmental milestone” as they first begin to question, and then to grow their own “voice of conscience.”
To know where acceptable or appropriate life action lies, this voice of conscience is used. Sometimes, it will show itself as more of a feeling or a knowing rather than any words per se, as you reflect on your earlier life experiences. In the same way, that an older child will shed the childish concepts of earlier, the much older adult sheds the outgrown concepts of the very young adult. For to continue to hold some of these concepts, unchanged or unaltered in any way, effectively holds you back from self-actualization.
In life, you are meant to express or manifest who and what you truly are inside, as compared to who and what you were raised to be. In order to do this, you must reach a point in your life where you do outgrow the earlier ideas that did help you to grow and develop, yet now they would be considered limitations or hindrances to your continued growth and development.
This is where I use the expression “to grow your own voice of conscience.” Another way to explain this is that as the young adult grows and develops from the life experiences they have, from a young adulthood into a “seasoned life veteran,” they will find themselves to a greater or lesser degree attaining what I will call “self-knowledge.”
This self-knowledge tends to bring about an end to “internal rules” and “regulations.” Instead, it substitutes the validity of the real personality, which I call the true personality. What you were “raised to be,” is separate and apart from this; however, it was necessary to help get you to a “certain point” of development in your life.
Does all this suggest anything to you?
Until next time,
~ Charles Stewart
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